July-August 2009 Selected Content

Everything I Needed to Know I Learned from Geese

Everything I ever needed to know about homeschooling I learned from geese. Our recently thawed pond heralded the departure of winter and the arrival of spring. In Minnesota, spring brings cherry blossoms, red buds and Canadian geese. Unlike the colorful blossoms, the geese are not altogether welcome given their loud honking and prolific droppings. One day, from behind the willow tree, a new family of geese slowly wended its way onto my lawn. Seeing Mama and Papa Goose with seven geese babies piqued my sympathy and curiosity and I no longer wished to chase them off my yard. Instead, I watched intently as the babies clumsily waddled into the outstretched wings of Mama Goose. Later, I watched the babies pop out from under her warm wing after a noon nap. Sitting there, watching the geese shepherd their babies around the grass, pecking, protecting their territory, patiently slowing their determined march towards the water, it struck me just how similar that goose family was to my own.

Mama and Papa Goose diligently kept watch while their tender goslings frolicked in the grass. This put me in mind of my own children. It appears to be universal for parents to stand upright and alert while children tumble and romp their way through the day. As my days of observation went on, I watched the goslings learn to make their way in this world with Mama and Papa Goose guiding them using the tools nature had provided. Eventually the mentoring the Goose Family provided allowed the goslings to fly away to find their own sunny shores.

Number One Unexpected Observation: Geese enjoy family time. They float placidly on the lake, in the wind and current, taking pleasure in friendly honks and measured pacing. When one goose baby gets a little far behind, Mama (or is it Papa?) glances behind and wills the wayward gosling back into place. I admired this instantly, immediately drawing similarities between this and my own parenting. When my children wander too far off course, I will them back on. If I had a wing, surely it would be outstretched to protect my youngster during a sunny day nap. If I and the Goose Mama shared this loving and protective characteristic, what else, I wondered, did we have in common?

On one particular day of goose watching, I observed a deliberate and exaggerated display of foraging. The parent geese were teaching the babies how to find food on their own. I recalled the grilled cheese sandwiches and boiled noodles my own daughter had become so adept at making. I showed her how to do this, just like Mama and Papa goose were training goslings. You may have feathers, my fowl friends, but look at us and how alike we are!

One day the movements were different and I realized the geese parents were preparing for flight lessons. First they were charging on the lawn and later into the water, swimming fast then stopping on a dime. They performed this lesson first with the goslings watching and then with them imitating. Over and over they did this for days on end. I recalled the two years we spent learning pre-algebra, going over and over concepts and balancing equations. Certain skills have to be mastered before moving along.

On some days, I saw Papa playact self defense. He sputtered and flapped and honked intentionally and one day, sure enough the goslings were all practicing as well. This lesson was not enough to protect the runt gosling and one morning, taking my seat to watch the geese, I spotted a downy lump in the grass. The goose parents were wailing and hopping around it. They spent the better part of the day mourning their lost baby and then, when the goslings were just about to give up hope that their parents would recover, Mama and Papa goose turned away from the loss and quietly moved on. Mama Goose stopped and looked back but Papa Goose urged her along, keeping himself close and reverent.

In the weeks of goose watching, everyday it seemed I witnessed a well planned lesson. Leading and following, swimming, flying, feeding, defending, all taught on the right day and at the right time for that particular brood. Other goose families lived on the shore around the small lake but not every family learned the same skills at the same time. Each family, it seemed, custom tailored lessons to fit their unique goslings' needs. It was intimacy and instinct working in harmony to propel the goslings from babyhood to autonomous adulthood. The style was patient but unyielding. The job to teach the goslings was theirs alone. Despite the impulse to gather the downy creatures under her wing and keep them there forever, the mother goose's desire to see them fly on their own was stronger. I know this feeling. I am a mother and whether it is animal instinct or earthly love, I have it in common with the Canadian Geese.

As a homeschooling parent I am often asked, "How do you know what to teach and when to teach it?" I cannot very well say that I watch geese for this inspiration. Sometimes just admitting that I don't follow a prescribed curriculum is enough to ruffle feathers. Yet I've always railed against the belief that I should assert outsider expectations over my own brood. My goose watching experience confirmed that instinct and familiarity, love and will, work inside us as parents.

When I talk about this insight, I get some blank stares. To know what to teach and when to do so is a daunting prospect and without a notion of where to start, natural tendencies may be hard to tap. Many days, I wonder if I'm on the right track or giving my children the skills they need in order to survive. For those moments of insecurity I use number of tricks to help get the ball rolling.

Sometimes reviewing a "scope and sequence" will get ideas flowing. At other times, an aimless trip to the library sets us on a meandering path through exploration. One morning, without a plan for the day I asked my daughter, "What do you want to know about?" She replied, "How does popcorn work?" Well, we were off to the races with that. With one question we were able to cover science, literature, history, geography, geology, home economics and math. It was a good month.

When I'm feeling apprehensive that perhaps I don't have the right tools or answers to the what-to-do-now question, I pull out my collection of scope-and-sequences or I go online to see what piques our interest, or I call a friend. But ultimately, just like I choose toys and activities to match my children's interests and abilities, deep down, I know when they are ready to learn something new. By personal and loving observation, I notice when they have mastered a concept or failed to understand it. The beauty of homeschooling without a set curriculum is that since my children are individuals I can tailor encouragement to their pace, nudging them along faster at times and spreading a wing over them at others. I can show them what they want to see and allow them to explore their own curiosities, all the while keeping them in line with the rhythm of our family. Like Mama and Papa Goose, I offer my children the lessons they need at the time they need them and then sit back and watch them fly.

© 2009, Stefanie Hofman