Home Education Magazine

September-October 1998 - Columns

College - Peter Kowalke

Choosing a College

Two years ago, in 1996, I was seventeen and a tad concerned. A lifelong homeschooler, more accurately dubbed an unschooler after The Teenage Liberation Handbook popularized the term, many of my friends were taking S.A.T.s and visiting college campuses. These were my home educated friends. My schooled friends, who were numerous at the time, were not only visiting colleges and taking tests I never even knew existed, but were also racking up scholarships and completing AP classes for supposed college credit. I didn't even know what it meant to be taking "AP." Could I take AP for college credit, too?

In my shaken subconscious at least, the ultimate indicator of whether or not unschooling "worked" hinged upon the question of college. As the theory went, unschooling versus public education ceased to exist in college. There would be no more competition, since both educational camps would dump into a common pool. I wouldn't have to wear my metaphorical unschooling badge wherever I went. In fact, there really would be no need to differentiate myself as an unschooler at all. Not to say that I wasn't proud of unschooling. Indeed, I was very proud and found myself preaching the merits of unschooling. I was tired, however. As I remarked in a New York Times article about home education, "The way I figure, I'm so tired of the trials of homeschooling that I want to sample the trials of college." It was a telling statement - I was very drained from the constant comparison with school kids. That, ironically, was the "trials" I experienced while learning at home.

The big problem with preparing for college like my contemporaries was the simple fact that I wasn't ready for college. My interests and, as a result, career path vacillated wildly. For two months I wanted to be a general practice M.D., followed by a computer programmer. A career as an electrical engineer came to mind, but so did the lifestyle of a stockbroker. Maybe I wanted to be a quantum physicist or a mathematician (regardless of the fact that I hadn't touched mathematics in years). How about a career as an advertising executive, entrepreneur or artist? My friends all assumed that I would be an English major or journalist. After all, I did write for nearly five hours a day and thanklessly devoted myself to Nation, my small-press magazine. How could I choose the "right" college when I was completely and absolutely undecided in what capacity I would earn my living?

Direction was not the only concern. Following my own schedule for the past seventeen years and having never gone to school, the thought crossed my mind: Could I handle a classroom setting, homework, tests, grades? Would abruptly thrusting myself into the collegiate world be a smart idea, going from the warm environs of my relaxed family atmosphere? In an attempt to stall the collegiate decision and gradually segue into a four-year school, I enrolled in a summer course at the local community college.

Getting into Lakeland Community College wasn't difficult. As a way to defray some of the costs of modern post-secondary education, community colleges have become popular as a method for satisfying the intro level courses at four year schools. You attend small, intimate, inexpensive classes at a community college, then transfer to a four year institution and head directly into their advanced subjects. In Ohio, where I live, high school students are even allowed to attend classes at community colleges for dual credit - high school and college credit. Only seventeen, under the dual enrollment policy I was allowed to enter during their summer term when policies were more flexible. I had to take Lakeland's placement tests to determine if I would need remedial work or could head directly into college level courses, but basically I could prove myself worthy of college through a back door. If I did well in my summer algebra class, they really had no reason to deny me access in the fall, when I would take the next course in their math sequence.

Hence, without any fanfare or movement to a dorm, technically I've been in college for the past two years (although I took a partial load my first few terms). I've been institutionalized now and no longer see "unschooler" as a part of my identity, am rightly considered a college student and have credits to show for my college education, but essentially I am still where I was two years ago: Where do I attend college and for what reasons?

Attending Lakeland has given me valuable insight on the matter, despite my inability to settle down with a single occupational goal. After making the Dean's List every term and thoroughly integrating myself with the college mentality - including the code that college students must never pass up a free meal - I've come to realize a very important distinction: I liked being an unschooler! In fact, after removing the fluctuating inferiority/superiority complex from years of unschooling, home education sounds pretty compelling again.

Currently, I'm in the process of resurrecting my unschooler identity. My sixteen year old brother, Adam, is still unschooling. He's kept me moderately plugged into the ideals and passions of self-directed learning, but some of my unschooler creativity has atrophied. I no longer envision touring the country by bike or other classic unschooler activities like starting a homeless shelter. No, I'm a college kid and my single duty is to read chapters one through five of To Read Literature before the weekend. I attend class, take notes, rush through homework and discuss tests with other disgruntled students. The process of rebuilding my unschooler enthusiasm for knowledge has called forth an increased emphasis in real-world activities, like competing in the Cleveland Poetry Slam competition for a chance at the national title and working as a freelance graphic artist. All of the energetic activities I see when I visit other home educated families is what I am trying to reproduce and refocus upon. My two year experiment with traditional education has left me "educated," sure, but subtly it feels obtuse and inefficient. I only notice the difference when talking with some of my homeschooler friends, when removed from the system. I've been removing myself from the system a lot in the last few months.

If removing myself from traditional education is a priority, how much am I willing to deviate and/or sacrifice to keep myself removed while still preparing for post-college life? How much is healthy? Taking a cue from the film Good Will Hunting, should I rush to the library determinedly and forget about college, instead immersing myself in the treasures of dusty books? Or, should I pursue unschooler activities such as my magazine while attending a big, traditional university such as Ohio State (where, as a transfer student in good standing, I am granted instant admission)?

Valuing the power of a diploma, the aid of a quantum physics professor and exhibiting a firm affinity for moderation, I'm betting on the middle ground. Armed with the knowledge that I was interested in more than just a good academic school (although I did apply to Stanford), in my second and final answer to the question of "Where are you going to college when you grow up," I looked into non-traditional schools such as Goddard, Antioch and particularly Hampshire College, located in Amherst, Massachusetts. Hampshire especially piqued my interest when they declared the staple homeschooler affirmation: "No grades, no majors, no tests" and went on to espouse the merits of self-directed learning. After a visit on campus and many good words from other unschoolers, I was sold.

For the first time in recent memory, I eagerly anticipate the end of summer. I feel more holistic, too, content with the knowledge that I'm not compromising my ideals. A big question still remains, however. Having formed a strong bond with my family and an extreme bond with my brother as a result of nineteen years of education at home, how much strain will I experience living by myself, over half a thousand miles away?

© 1998 Peter Kowalke

Peter Kowalke is a lifelong unschooler now enrolled at Hampshire College in Amherst, MA and is editor of Nation Magazine, a publication about people and their lives. To order a sample issue of Nation, send $2.95 to Nation Magazine, P.O. Box 772, Mentor, Ohio 44061. Peter can also be reached through Nation.

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